Dean vs. the octopus

                 There are three animals that I cherish, respect, and want for a pet. A bear, a penguin, and an octopus. My husband ate one of them. He couldn't stick with talentless animals like chicken, beef, and fish like the rest of us meat-eaters. Nope, he went out on business, had extravagant dinners with bigstuff merchants, and came back with octopus and possibly other exotic animals in his belly.  He wasn't even dining with Asians. Those countries are all about eating magnificent or rare creatures.

                In his ignorant consumption, he ate a mollusk that not only tasted "gross," but has the mimic ability overcoming that of a chameleon. His dinner was literally "smart food" .  On top of being superbly awesome, octopuses are "conceptual thinkers". They can unscrew jars to get pirate treasures and mirror both colors and shapes even though they are color blind(crazy right?). After learning how to escape, these Houdini artists use long and short term memory to flee faster on round two. 

           I think it's really important for me to continue these facts...especially if Dean is starting to feel guilty:)  They are stealthy little devils that spray their ink before they go after their prey...to keep it cheeky sneaky. If a tentacle gets severed, no worries, Octo-incredible just grows a superior one (unless he's been boiled, filleted, and passed around by business men). They have three hearts and blue blood as well as shoot nerve poison and fly spaceships.

          Want some more?.... I can't stop anyway....... My favorite thing about Octopuses besides their superhero GI Joe camouflage is their maternal nature. There are a lot of lousy human moms( Casey Anthony), but these creatures will sit on their eggs no matter what! Many of them die of starvation for their babies.

          I can't own one of these creatures for a few reasons, but mainly because I'm afraid she'll escape her cage, crawl into our bed, and put the moves on Dean(or kill him with a knife).
          Some researchers say that if Octopuses lived a lot longer then 3-5 years, they would accumulate so much information becoming the "dominant intelligent on earth".

                                          Here's what recently happened

                        These creatures are just too sophisticated to not have a secret life.

What Happens if Octopuses Live Longer

                                                                 Or Heaven forbid 

You can imagine that's yourself if you are a girl reader. If you are a boy... the octopus has either

A. Stolen your body and found a way to attach himself to it

   B. Jumped on top of your head to molest your girl.

or

                                  C. Figured out how to grow a human body so a new half breed is possible.

I vote for C because option C turns this             Hot Bod   

                                                         

                                                                                     into

                                                             A Hot Bod Cephalopod

                                                     

This story is dedicated to Craig Storms.

Also, I want to thank the researcher that really believes Octopuses could dominate the world and this picture below is definitely plausible. 

                                                

         

                            For jaw dropping bewilderment check this out                                                             
http://www.sciencefriday.com/videos/watch/10397